The time my water broke...but not really

For the record, I am only 32 weeks pregnant.  Some might think I am further along and I have had quite a few well intentioned strangers telling me that "the baby has dropped" or that "it looks like it might be any day now" or (my personal favorite) that "it looks like that baby might just drop out of you."  Yes, please.  It should be so easy. 

Today I went on a tour for work of a health institute.  During the presentation, the baby was obviously enthralled by the speaker's voice and reacted by performing somersaults in my belly.  The physician leading the discussion must have seen the Alien moment of my belly flopping all over the place. As I placed my hand over my stomach in an attempt to "quiet her down" or at the very least cover the flop show, the doctor stopped his presentation and asked if I was going into labor.  The well intentioned chap, possibly serious or joking (one can never be sure but there is a 50/50 chance) offered to deliver my baby right then and there.  While he was a psychiatrist he did mention that he has delivered at least 4 babies.  The cheap part of me wondered if he would charge my insurance if he were to deliver my baby right there during the site visit.  But I digress.  I assured him that I was not in labor and hopefully would not be for another 8 weeks.  Not to sound ungrateful I did thank him for his concern and made a mental note to tour more medical facilities as I neared my due date. 

As a nerdy side note, the Kaiser Institute has recently reported that health insurance costs have risen 8-9% in the past year, since the passage of the healthcare law.  Prompting me to recently joke with my OB that she may have to deliver my baby in the parking lot of Kroger in exchange for groceries.  Again I digress.  Blame my mommy brain drain. 

Upon exiting the facility today, I was drinking a bottle of water.  I had taken a moment to stop and catch up with a few of my counterparts from other offices.  I realized that I had not tightened the cap for my water bottle, but not before I had squeezed the bottle against my belly in an attempt to shuffle everything I was carrying.  The result: water, water everywhere: on my belly, down my legs, on the beautiful modern marble floor of the facility.  I, of course, realized my mistake immediately and looked down.  But all my colleagues saw was me look down at a puddled of liquid around my legs and shoes.  It was clear by the fear on their faces that they had suspected that my water had broken then and there.  I quickly explained my mistake but it took a moment for the horror to leave their eyes.  They snapped into action and their concern was that I might fall on the marble so they ran for paper towels. 

And then it occured to me.  What a fantastic way to get a good chuckle.  Or possibly get out of bad situations.  Traffic ticket, squeeze a bottle of water.  Uncomfortable confrontation.  Water.  Doing laundry.  Water.  The possibilities are endless.  In my first labor my water was broken for me.  So I was spared the humiliating stories that so many women face after having their water break in a very public setting.  Even as I write this I realize that this will come back to haunt me.  But for now, I think I just found a new favorite joke to play. 

Drama King

Over the past few weeks Liam has learned a new skill that he is carefully honing: The art of being a drama king.  I can't say for sure where he gets it.  His new task consists of slowly falling off of his tricyle, pulling said bike over himself as he wedges his limbs underneath the wheels, and then calling out for help.  The first few times this happened, Eric and I really thought he had hurt himself and had come running.  Until we saw the smirk on his lips as he realized that it was a potential goldmine in attention mongering.  As we began to watch from different corners of the house, we soon saw the whole shameful act unfold itself.  Now, I am contributing to the issue by taking a series of pictures on my iPhone of Liam and his..."work."  Enjoy. 

Caught in the act...and loving every moment of it.

Listening to my body

This pregnancy had been fairly text book.  I wouldn't say I was experiencing anything too different from my pregnancy with Liam.  Until recently.  I started having carpel tunnel.  My dear friend, Allison, recommended sleeping in wrist supports, which has drastically improved my circulation.  Poor Eric.  I am quite attractive these days what with my double wrist supports, retainer, glasses and big belly.  I am so thankful that man loves me for who I am....on the inside I imagine. 

Last week I woke up in the middle of the night with some abdominal cramping.  I thought maybe it was tied into stress and anxiety that I am having at work with several big events coming up, so I decided to ignore it.  But the cramping kept going for a few days.  I consulted my BFF Stephanie to see if she had these similar symptoms during her pregnancy.  We concluded that it was just tied into the round ligament stretching.  It sounds odd to say, but even though it is not my first pregnancy, things start to get fuzzy in my head.  Did I feel these pains the first time around?  Was I as big?  At what month did XY and Z happen? 

After a few days I found that the pain was actually getting worse, paired with small Braxton Hicks contractions that prompted me to finally break down and call my doctor.   Who, by the way, is the most awesome OB in the entire world!  So after it got to the point where it was almost too painful to walk, I called my doctor who had me come in for a looksy.  They did a standard sono to make sure that there was nothing obvious like a tear in the placenta.  Fortunately there was not.  But because my pain was isolated at that time to the right side of my belly, she had me go up to labor and delivery for more tests.  Nothing can freak a gal out more than hearing anything before 37 weeks, "why dontcha go check into L&D for some tests?" 

By this point Eric and met me at the hospital and up we went.  Long story short (and yes, I realize that this story is already long enough) everything was fine with le bebe.  With momma?  The jury is still out.  No appendicitis, cervix is still closed, contractions are still sporadic - which is probably not unusual for a second pregnancy.  Their best guess is probably kidney stones (also super common in pregnancy) or a stretched rectus abdominal muscle.  Unfortunately, there is not much you can do for either thing except take a little Advil and use a muscle relaxer. 

Being pregnant the second time around is a lot harder in so many ways.  During your first pregnancy you can be....well....selfish.  You can nap when you want to, take a nice hot shower, watch your favorite shows with your feet up, etc.  The second time around, you are so busy chasing and bargaining with your first child, working, and trying to keep house that you sometimes notice that your first and last rest of the day doesn't come until that little one is in bed and any minor housework is done.  It helps if you have a great partner like I do.  Eric has really been invaluable during this time.  Technically they don't like you to carry things any heavier than 20 pounds during pregnancy.  But when you have a 30 pound toddler, it is easier said than done. 

So I guess that this was my wake up call to listen to my body a little more.  Even though sometimes I physically feel like I can chase Liam down the street as he wildly drives his bike, or lift him out of his crib and pick up the dog, I need to rely on others for help for the remainder of my pregnancy.  For right now, my belly hurts like I have done a thousand sit ups in a row.  But at least Ansley is still healthy and strong.  And bonus: to add to my already stellar boudoir apparel, a compression band for my belly!