Aging gracefully?

Twenty something years ago, on a cold December night in Albuquerque, my Mom went into labor. Twenty something years later, her daughter is attempting to accept another year by aging gracefully. So far I have felt a flux of emotions about my upcoming birthday. Sort of like the seven stages of grief. One moment I am totally nonchalant about birthdays and getting older. Afterall, people are suffering all over the world. Why get upset about something as trivial as a birthday? The next moment I am kicking and screaming, wondering how long I can start to lie about my age before the gig is up.

I think big milestone birthdays cause you to look back on your life: where you have been and where you are going. I feel very blessed to have an awesome husband and a healthy son. I have an amazing job that affords me many opportunities. I have a great extended family and wonderful community of friends. By all accounts I am a very lucky girl.

So why does it feel like I am going through some sort of life crisis? I have never before struggled with birthdays. Maybe it is because past birthdays signaled exciting new changes. Old enough to drive. Old enough to vote. Old enough to drink. But now? Old enough to be entered into a new age bracket when filling out the census? Old enough to get botox? Where is the excitement?

However, I realize that this next stage in my life can include brand new adventures. Eric and I still have a lot of traveling to do. We hope to eventually build a home that we have been designing for years. We have new adventures to plan as Liam gets older. I want to do things that I still haven't had the opportunity to do. So maybe, at least for now, I will try to look at this next stage as a new chapter in my life while saying goodbye to what feels like an old friend.